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2 hours ago, mrbuzzardstubble said:

Drop bear

Saw this on the ABC News website. Funny as.

Irrelevant......wrong thread!?

Edited January 15, 20206 yr by stevoz

I recently picked a new GP. After two visits and exhaustive Lab tests he said I was doing 'fairly well' for my age (I've just reached 73). A little concerned about that comment I couldn't resist asking him "Do you think I'll live to be 85?" He asked "Do you smoke tobacco or drink beer wine or hard liquor? "Oh not much grog these days and don't smoke" I replied. "I'm not doing drugs either!" Then he asked "Do you eat rib-eye steaks burgers ribs? "I said "Not really... my former doctor said that all red meat is very unhealthy!" "Do you spend a lot of time in the sun? Like playing golf boating sailing surfing hiking or bicycling?" "No I don't" I said. He asked "Do you gamble drive fast cars have lots of sex?" "No" I said. He looked at me and said "Then why the hell do you want to live to 85 then?"

 

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.    

 

How was he killed?" asked one detective. 

 

"With a golf gun,"  the other detective replied. 

 

"A golf gun! What is a golf gun?" 

  

"I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan." 

Serena Williams knocked out of Australian Open by Wang Qiang in three sets

Knocked out by Wang Qiang? I think we've all been there.

Edited January 24, 20206 yr by JukKluk2

I rang the Incontinence Hotline last week.

 

They asked me if I could hold on for a while.

 

 

13 minutes ago, progladyte said:

I rang the Incontinence Hotline last week.

 

They asked me if I could hold on for a while.

 

 

I just pissed myself laughing. Oops, would you mind sharing the number.